Throwback Loosh's (Pt. 1)
Baby Loosh was a sweet kid. Careful and pensive. Afraid of the unfamiliar but willing to observe. ALWAYS down to read, and write, and play dress up, and dance around. Very intentional with barbie storylines and 'binky' placement (I had a favorite corner of my baby blanket I liked to rub on the top of my nose). Preschool and Kindergarten Loosh loved to please the teacher, and could get pretty bossy with her little brother and other kids. She was an early fan of cooking shows in the morning before school. Favorite things: soup and french fries with gravy (how Canadian), Little Mermaid and Fivel Goes West, Sharon, Lois & Bram, books.
Elementary School Loosh grew her hair out, wore a lot of Mom-sewn jumpers and sundresses, and continued to play teacher's pet. She fell in love with Mexican food and started putting hot sauce on everything. She loved creative writing and math 'Mad Minutes', and role-playing as the pink power ranger in knee and elbow pads with Josh in the yard. She took singing lessons, then fell in love with dance, competing from the age of 9 in a curly ponytail and jazz boots. She forged an unspoken connection with her cat--they were the same age, after all. Favorite things: Super Mario 3, books, salsa & chips, dance, Michael Jackson, Kelowna summer vacations, and Grandma's house.
Middle School Loosh was pretty awkward, but not unhappy. Like most kids, she got preoccupied with social structures at school and msn chat, back when you had to figure out the letter/symbol combos for emojis, like cheat codes. She heard girls described by boys as one of two things: hot or ugly, so she aimed for hot--krimped hair and blue eyeliner and leopard print pants. She started to like sports--and didn't have much time for teams with her dance schedule, but always looked forward to P.E. She moved to a bigger town, learned from kind, creative dance teachers, wore braces, and got her first part time jobs. Favorite things: pizza, Hawaii, P!nk, Robyn, & Destiny's Child, basketball, friendship bracelets, books, and Jim Carrey.
In the summer of 9th Grade, High School Loosh seemed to coalesce in a matter of days. She shed her half tomboy personality and figured out makeup. Her braces came off and hair got cut in layers. She rocked fitted dresses & skirts, and the attention of popular boys, although she quickly discovered that popular boys weren't the most respectful tribe. She failed her first driver's test on her 16th birthday. She transferred to a more cutthroat dance studio where she learned the true meanings of sweat and dance mom politics. She lost her virginity in a way that didn't scar her. She moved to 'the city' and kind of let 12th Grade pass her by without making waves: good grades, not much school spirit. She went to friends' graduation ceremonies, but not her own. She found her crew of misfits: friends from dance who would stay up all night on the weekends getting stoned and watching movies; friends who would later disband because of complicated romances--an awkward and disappointing lesson. Favorite things: Saturday morning dance class, the Black Eyed Peas, Led Zeppelin, drinking games, lip synching, sarcasm, Margaret Atwood & Timothy Findley.
Why is it so hard to be comfortable in your own skin in high school? Is it the school structure? The hormones? The feeling of both wanting to hurry up and slow down? The deep and dangerous forest of sexuality? The pressure to fit in?
I suppose it could have always been worse. I left high school pretty intact.
Stay tuned for more throwbacks tomorrow! Hope everyone is safe, healthy, and taking care of themselves. I'm sending love.